Almost Does Count

One moment can set us on a dramatically different course.

All I was going to post this week was: I am (happily) spending the week in Northern Michigan with family and I hope you all have a wonderful holiday and time with loved ones. 

Then, we almost got in a horrible car wreck on the way up here.  So now I have a little more I’d like to say.

I’m not sure why it takes those near-miss events in our life to shake us up, but boy, was I shaken to the core on Saturday. 

We were heading north on the highway when we noticed traffic had come to a stand-still up ahead (it looked to be construction-related).  Vinny made the quick decision to pull off to the shoulder of the exit ramp we were passing.  We were going to consult our map and see if it made more sense to get off the highway and find a way around the back-up. 

It wasn’t ten seconds later that two cars barreled past us at top speed, neither of them seeming to notice the back-up just ahead.  My stomach lurched. 

I watched in horror as the two cars slammed into the stopped traffic.  Of course, because the two morons in those cars hadn’t slowed down, neither had some of the cars behind them.  Soon, there were cars crashing into each other, flying off onto the median and the shoulder of the highway, with approaching cars flying off the road to avoid the oncoming mess.  It was something you’d see in a movie for sure, except this time it was real.

Partway through all of this Vinny decided we needed to get moving down the exit ramp to remain safe, so we did.  I have no idea how much worse the scene became.  The event was already seared into my brain.

For the next couple hours I felt sick to my stomach.  I was shaky.  I couldn’t look at the kids without becoming teary.  What would have happened if that had been us?  Then I couldn’t stop thinking, “Well, who was in those cars?  Did they have small children, too?  Was everyone okay?”  A thousand nightmare scenarios raced through my mind. 

This much is certain: if Vinny hadn’t made that split-second decision we would have been rear ended at high speed.  

So when I say we were almost in a horrible car wreck, suddenly the word “almost” becomes so much more meaningful than it ever has before.  Especially when I go on to consider that I was almost the one driving and I am almost certain that I wouldn't have had the quick wit to pull off the highway.

And it’s not surprising that my initial thought in all of this was, “the kids.”  Not that I wouldn’t be concerned about what might have happened to Vinny or I, but... it’s like that doesn’t even register anymore.  No, the instinctual response is always, “the kids!” 

So much of it is the fact that I have no control over their wellbeing in instances like that.  And no matter what, I would have felt guilty on some level, even though it would have been no fault of our own.  I would have felt like I needed to do a better job to protect my chickens.

But all this is for naught, right?  We weren’t in that accident, someone else was.  We continued on our journey safely, albeit shaken.  For the rest of the day (and beyond) I thought about how our lives could have drastically changed in that one instant.  It’s scary to think that way.

And on many levels, pointless.  Horrible things could happen any second of any day.  Thankfully they almost never do (notice that word almost again).  It’s just that sometimes, the balance tips, the almost disappears, and you are left with the aftermath of whatever that almost didn’t prevent.

On this day we were spared.  I could not be more thankful, grateful … relieved.  But then I have to remember that someone else was not so lucky, so then I pull my family closer.  I hug them harder.  Look at them longer.  Linger in the little moments that happen every day, but that I sometimes lose sight of because days are long, I get tired, and it’s all I can do to make it until bedtime. 

So what began as a short “have a good week” post has morphed into something much more meaningful for me.  How often are we bombarded with the “don’t take life for granted” “live life to its fullest” “don’t forget to tell your loved ones how much you love them” sentiments?  Sometimes we take these credos to heart.  Most times we don’t.  It’s easy to nod along, yeah, yeah, yeah, and then go about our day. 

I don’t often make requests here.  Who am I to tell you to do anything?  Well, I’m going to do it anyways.   

When you are done reading this post please walk over to or phone someone you love dearly and give them a squeeze or a kind word of love or a statement of gratitude.  Feel that moment with all your heart.  Then have a nice holiday ;)